01334: While Alone in the Room

How could everything turn around so quickly? Part of me fails to fully comprehend what exactly is happening right now while the more rational side of my brain seems to have a very clear peg. I guess I'm just not fully ready to accept things.

They say that if you love something, you should set it free. If it comes back, then it's yours. If it never does then perhaps it was never meant to be.

They say that you should also compromise in a relationship and be willing to meet the other person halfway. But for how long should that go on and what exactly acts as the measurement for the halfway point?

When you make a promise or some other commitment, are you more accountable to your own standards of integrity or are there conditions for when the other party can probably void said promise and free you of your obligations with risk of guilt or fear?

I always say that love simply is - and I still believe in that. But what do you do when a person close to you, someone that you love, does not feel the same way? Why complicate love with things like fear, hesitation and guilt?

Has my love blinded me so much so that I fail to see the bigger picture? Have I truly become so emotionally compromised that I've gone all the way back to becoming a martyr for love?

Good Friday marks the day that Jesus was tortured and eventually died on the cross. Black Saturday marks the day his body was laid to rest while his spirit soared free. Easter Sunday marks the day that Jesus rose from the dead, thus fulfilling the prophecy that mankind would be saved by the son of God.

I'm not very religious these days, but this is definitely a time when I want to fully believe in the possibilities of resurrection. May the morrow bring better understanding of things and perhaps the strength to let go of fear, find the courage to continue on and the ability to believe that love simply is.

My heart is with my family right now. I hope it will still beat vibrantly and strong before this weekend is over.


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