01308: The First Month

Yup, it has already been a month. Or perhaps somewhat more "accurately", it has only been a month since Tobie, Prince and embarked on this new adventure of a relationship we have together. And while there are so many other terms out there that people find "easier" to use in order to capture our relationship within the confines of a single word, I feel the best word that fits us best is family.

A month consists of an average of 30 days, which is 720 hours or 43,200 minutes or 2,592,00 seconds. Or 2.592 × 1018 picoseconds if we want to go that far. And none of those numbers are going to get turned into a catchy Broadway show tune any time soon. In the end they're just markers for the passage of time that help us linear beings feel like we know where we're headed in terms of this particular universe.

And this is not as simple as an equation of 2 + 1 = 3 either, since it doesn't feel like Tobie and I exist as a separate unit with Prince sort of trailing along for the ride. In our minds, the numbers work better when 3 = 1 and the rest of the world can just figure out how that works when they feel like they have the time. And as much as I'm completely proud of the love I share for both Tobie and Prince, at the same time I don't feel the need to have to convince other people of the validity of our feelings or how what we're doing is just fine the way it is and doesn't need too much meddling from others. But that's me.

It has certainly been an interesting month full of some very stellar highs and some very emotional lows. But that's all part of the process as is the same case for pretty much any other relationship not matter how many men and / or women are involved in the arrangement. You start with a promise that you hold onto as you get to know one another even better. Those in the relationship will face challenges like fear and doubt and will try to face them alone and eventually face them with the help of others. There will be misunderstandings and miscommunications. And of course some really amazing and wonderful moments.

Relationships come with all of that and more. It's both good and bad. It's both easy and hard. It's both magical and very, starkly real. But in between the extremes, there's a lot of life to be lived, a lot of happiness to be had and a lot of love to be shared. And that is what makes all the "effort" become worthwhile. And I put the word effort into quotes mainly because it won't actually feel like "extra work" or even like "sacrifice" per se when your love is honest and sincere and you get as much love back as what you send out into the world. Labors of love, to borrow the classic term, are "paid" back not in similar actions, deeds or gestures but in love as well.

And like what I wrote before, love is not something you can measure and quantify using graduated cylinders and weighing scales.

Love simply is.

So here's to an amazing first 30 days or 720 hours or 43,200 minutes or 2,592,000 seconds or 2.592 × 1018 picoseconds. I know the three of us have shared more amazing life memories than some people have done in half their lives and we have so much more in store for the future. Thanks to everyone who have supported us in our adventure of love (and even those who challenge us to prove that this is real). Thanks to those who see us as a source of inspiration that love truly knows no bounds and can conquer all. And thanks to those who are just happy to see the three of us so happy - we're more than glad to share our happiness with you.

And thanks most of all to Tobie and Prince who make every day a magical and amazing new experience for me. Thank you for loving me and making me feel so loved (which can be different, sadly enough). Thank you for allowing me to take care of you and feel fulfilled in ways that one cannot easily experience as a gay man without the right to get married and have children. And thank you for being my inspirations to do better, work harder and reach for my dreams just as I find every way to support you attain yours.

I love you both so much. And I'll do my best to show you both just how much I love you each and every day for the rest of my life.